So I recently ran across this questionnaire and it caused me to stop and think. As a child I had great ambitions and dreams and often times as an adult I think about those dreams and some are still the same, but I’ve also realized some deeper things about life, I feel. So without further adu I’m going to answer these 10 questions as best as I can!

1: My favorite thing to do growing up was a combination of 2 things; first as an adolescent, I loved pretending I was an elf child that lived among wolves and my bike was often my wolf or horse that I rode…as a teenager I loved entertaining my friends by always trying to be funny.

2: My dreams were to be a veterinarian and never get married or have children but have lots of animals.

3: My favorite topic to talk about is probably health and fitness! Though I need to practice more of what I preach! LOL!

4: Probably bargain shopping! I waste a lot of time on my phone like a lot of us do, but I always feel guilty for it, so I’m gonna stick with looking for a bargain, cuz I can seriously lose track of time especially if I’m on a hot streak!

5: I honestly don’t envy anyone’s life because I know everybody has problems of some sort or another. I enjoy my life and I am blessed to have the basics I need to survive. And, it could ALWAYS be worse.

6: I would pursue my early mention of becoming a veterinarian or my second choice of photography. Physical therapy assistant was also something I gravitated towards as I got older but I never pursued any of it.

7: Do more of the things that you say there’s no time for, make time for them. Live boldly, love deeply and it’s ok to make mistakes, it means you tried. Best of all, never give up! Quitters never finish and finishers never quit!

8: Help my husband start a business! It’s easier staying in my comfort zone, knowing every two weeks a paycheck is coming! That’s my biggest fear! What if’s!

9: Start building my childhood dreams!

10: A lot of things! Build my dream animal rescue haven for cats, dogs, and horses! Start a Bed and Breakfast business, that overlooked my sprawling animal haven! Help my husband start his business.

It’s kind of comical because I’m nowhere near these things, yet I’m content. I am blessed to have a happy home, a wonderful husband, and good family and friends around me. I’m doing things I love to do and I’m not so busy I forget to enjoy the mundane, unexciting, days of life! Life truly is what you make it, and no matter what curve balls it throws at us, aim for the stars! Even if it never makes it off the dirt! Laugh often, because life is too short to be serious all the time. ❤️

Good morning! So just wanted to share a little update regarding my previous post. I had last mentioned that I would be looking into some diets and deciding on what I felt would be a good choice for me.

So with that said, I have decided to start a Keto diet. My main reason for picking this diet is that I’ve always been a firm believer in, “I need my carbs to fuel my running.” Well, that would be legit “IF” in fact I was running enough to need the excess carbs.

Carbs turn into sugar if not used fast enough, and as we know sugar especially refined sugars are not good for us, so rather then using sugar/carbs as a fuel source, since it only provides a short burst of energy life, we replace the carbs/sugars with FATS and begin to use “fat” as our fuel source. Any person knows that when doing cardio or having a good workout, that the first 20 minutes of that workout is burning off the “junk” or the sugars/carbs before we even get into the FAT-BURNING phase, so why not switch our bodies fuel source to fat so that we can maximize our efforts? Only makes since to me.

My family history also played a part in my choosing of a Keto Diet. We have history of Heart attacks (mom has had 2) both my parents have high blood pressure, my father has Type 2 Diabetes (Not from sweets, but from Carbs that turned to sugar). So this has given me incentive to be the best me I can be. I can’t predict that I’ll live the longest or be the most healthy of my family, but I’d rather not ignore the possible road signs and just “see what happens”.

So having written a couple weeks back, I am now bringing my update.

Later in that week, I had decided I would do the Keto, and I attempted to start, but I quickly discovered that I had literally NO healthy low carb options in my household! So I had to plan out some meals and snacks and prepare. So last Monday I went grocery shopping, and then I spent about 2+ hours meal prepping for the week. It was a long process but SO worth it when morning came and I had to fix 4 lunches! So that was a huge step in the right direction. My mistake was not properly reading some things for this diet and I kind of sabotaged myself in the 1st week, though I STILL was way under my usual Carb/Sugar intake…so thankfully I was still able to lose 3.3 lbs!

I am fixing to do some meal prepping and planning, and mapping out this next week for lunches and dinners. I’m also excited to say, my husband said he’d like to join me! So that’s always helpful when your SO is in full support.

I will weigh in again either Tuesday or Wednesday and then I’ll give another update next Monday. Until then…✌

So this may sound strange to some, but Mondays are probably my favorite day of the week. It signals the beginning of a new week, which means whatever we failed to accomplish last week we can re-center ourselves and try again. Whether it be household chores, laundry, exercise, or devotions…start again. This is something I’ve been trying to establish in this new year…routines!

So with that said, I’m going to paint myself into a corner by putting my goals out there in the open, and hopefully it’ll help motivate me to be on track, and establish a solid routine.

So the New Year found me once again back at my heaviest weight (outside of prego weight). I weighed in at 166.6 pounds last Tuesday…this morning I was 164.5 so it’s small steps but I’ll take it! (Apparently I don’t have full body shots so I’ll post one by the end of this). I have been doing a 10lb shuffle that is so annoying…I lose it, then regain it…and i need to make a serious food change.

Sugar and carbs are my 2 main problems! I use the fact that i need carbs for energy for running, which yes a runner does need carbs, but that don’t mean they consume them at outrageous proportions…and I don’t run enough to be concerned about my energy levels! Nice try Jesse! Sugar on the other hand, turn into carbs and then we’re back at the carb problem….soooooo with that all out there in the open, I’m going to aim for 30 minutes on the treadmill at least 4x a week (30min a day isn’t unattainable, I’ve been sitting here writing this for almost that amount of time…jus’ sayin’) and I’m going to incorporate some old fashioned bodyweight exercises that have always worked, and will always work. Some planks, push ups, situps, squats, hydrants, donkey kicks, etc….

My goal is to reach 140lbs again…this may seem on the higher side to some, but for me it is what I feel my most comfortable weight. I’ve never been a small framed girl/woman, my family genes have not blessed me with a petite bone structure…I come from thick stock folks, sturdy and well-built. My momma was raised on a farm and when she enlisted in the air force she had to lose 10lbs and she was not fat! It was muscle, and on my daddy’s side, they’re just Amazon women! So I measure in at 5′ 3.75″ and 164.5 (as of now). From the time I hit puberty I pretty much stayed about 145lbs and the lowest I’ve ever been in my teen/adult life was 133! And let’s just say I looked like a bobblehead! So in all honesty I’m not concerned about the number on the scale per say, but I do want to feel confident and sexy, and I want to be an inspiration to others. So I’m going to start this week off with the intentions of researching a food plan that I can afford and realistically stick with. Diets never work as a fad, it must be a lifestyle change, so I need to find what I can do long-term that is affordable, because let’s face it…eating healthy isn’t the cheapest nowadays, and that has a tendency to derail me, not that I gorge myself on potato chips and honey buns but I make poor food choices about 75% of the time. Another problem I have is actually not eating as often as I should…so therefore my body stores the food rather then burn it off. So having smart snacks on hand is wise.

Ok I think I’ve rambled enough, so wish me luck and keep me company on this journey.

Life is a beautiful thing. I am by nature a pretty positive person, and life to me means more than just breathing or being alive. Life to me is the memories and experiences I’ve made along the way, and yet the chance to dream of achieving anything I want…not that I’m an overachiever in capacity really, but I do admit, I love my life.

Sure I’ve had bad days, and lots of good days, but mostly just “ordinary” days. Days when nothing tragic happens whether good or bad, ordinary days when I wake up and do simple daily routine things or days when I wake up and I’m straight up a lazy slug (there are those days). I joke with my husband about how his account of a day is compared to my account of the day…let’s just say I NEVER struggled with writing essays!

In life, I see so much detail, so much color and beauty…in ordinary things. Maybe it comes from having so little as a child, or maybe from the fact that my parents were realists. Whatever the case may be, life is beautiful.

Now I’m not saying my life has been perfect, or that I’ve had a horrible life, it’s been neither of those things. There are plenty of things I’d change if I could, but for the most part I’m content with how its played out so far.

I try to be positive about life, but I admit, I get down sometimes. I’m not a depressed person, and I feel horrible for people who struggle with depression, because I understand it’s real, and it is an awful way to feel. To maybe help one understand me, I can draw to mind two instances in my life that depression hovered around me, nipping at my mind like a relentless fog.

The first time I ever felt “depression” was about 5 years ago as I watched my 2-day old son have a seizure while the nurses tried setting up an IV into his tiny hand, and then performing a spinal tap on him…it wasnt until they took him away from me in an ambulance, all lights flashing, as it sped away towards Seattle’s Children’s Hospital. To follow that ambulance was torture! My very heart and soul was snatched away from me and I was given no choice but to follow behind. I felt like a trapped animal, ready to hurt anything that got in my way, and yet i couldn’t stop crying, I was weak and vulnerable…even today as I write this, my heart feels the intense squeezing i felt that day, the helplessness, the fear, the pain…I’ve told this story many times but I’ve never put the details down to such extent…and I’m taking it easy! Depression was closing in on me, my husband, bless his heart, didn’t know what to do or say, and during the entire day he held his composure together! Not ONE tear fell from his eye that I saw! He knew I needed his steadiness, his “bland” perspective I so often tease him about! Thank God he didn’t have a personality like mine! I would have drowned in sorrow that day! He stayed strong and steady…we finally got to the hospital and I was able to stand at my son’s bedside and hold his precious hand and touch his beautiful face. Oh so many times I would just lose control of my emotions and I would weep, and that “fog” would come a little closer.

I watched my son go through an EEG(brain monitoring test) checking for abnormal activity. Then I watched again as he was wheeled into a room for a CT scan of his head, and then lastly at the end of the day, to undergo an MRI of his head.

I was not allowed to stay with my baby through the night, but finally after walking into the ER around 11pm Thursday night, I was finally able to hold my baby around 8pm Friday evening! He was fed a sugar drip throughout the day, and imagine this, he not once cried or caused any trouble! These people were invading every once of privacy he dreamed of having! They drew multiple vials of blood, poked and prodded and stuck electrodes to his tiny head, and he stayed so calm and so happy! Finally I was able to hold him again! To smell him! To feel his tiny body fighting for LIFE!

You see, he was having seuziers, and he was only 2 days old! There was no explanation of why! He was brand new! He had no history to deduce from, he just barely arrived! The EEG showed “abnormal” activity in his brain waves, and we were still waiting to hear about the MRI…

Finally, after almost 24 hours from the time we walked into the ER, the neurologist called our room to explain what was on the MRI…he had blockages in his brain they said, and that they were causing mini strokes/seizures! They said they’d explain more in the morning, we should get some rest. Well by this point I was thoroughly and emotionally exhausted and I couldnt comprehend the magnitude of the results…my husband calmly explained in as gentle a way as he could, that blockages=lack of blood flow=lack of oxygen=possible brain damage=difficulties beyond imagining. It was at this point the “fog” overtook me! In an instant it was there! I seen it in my mind, walking out of the elevator in the shape of a black form like a man, and it slowly walked down the hall to the door that led to our tiny closet sized room, and it came into the corridor and walked to our exact door, and as it came closer it melted into a fog and began to seep under our door and I knew if it reached me it would destroy me! With it came such evil and vile feelings and images and thoughts that I have NEVER EVER imagined! And I did the only thing I could think of! I SCREAMED for my God to help me! To cast this thing away! And in an instant, it was gone! Then I wept and vern wept for the first time that day, because he felt it too! I remember getting down on my knees and asking God to take control of my son, and to do the impossible, to change the report! I specifically asked Him to place angels around my sons bed that night and protect and heal him, and I promised I’d do my best to handle whatever the morrow held, that I would love my child no matter what the outcome and I would be thankful for him even if it meant a difficult life.

So here’s the good part! We finally slept, about 48 hours awake at that point, we slept 5 hours, woke up and again prayed that God would intervene and give us strength to handle whatever news we were about to hear. We entered the NICU unit where my baby had been through the night, and as we approached his room the nurse was absolutely beaming with pride and love! The very first thing out of her mouth was this and I quote, “Your son is absolutely beautiful! We all took turns holding him and feeding him through the night, he was an absolute ANGEL!” When I heard the word “angel” I KNEW God had stepped in once again on my behalf. The neurologist was smiling ear to ear, shaking his head, saying he didnt understand how it happened but when he looked again at the MRI image it wasn’t the same as before! He showed us the image and in the area where the trauma was, there was a milky cloud over top of it that they couldn’t explain. I could explain it though! God! The doctors said if there would ever be an issue later in life it would be most notable in my sons “speech” & “mobility”. Well folks, let me just say that as I’ve watched my son grow and go from an infant to a 5 year old little boy, he has been extremely advanced in his speech skills and in his mobility! The pediatrician that sent us to Seattle is his pediatrician today, and he gets teary eyed when he sees us, because he knows that our story should be much different!

And that is a day and an experience I’ll never forget, and I know depression is real, and it is terrible, and I will forever be thankful that I have been blessed with a beautiful life and that I don’t fight that battle on a regular basis. I know sometimes there’s nobody to talk to, or maybe you think nobody cares, but I know this…God heard my cry and he stepped in, and even if you don’t sit on a pew every Sunday, He still has His ear tuned towards us. Maybe you don’t know “how” to pray or talk to God, but it’s simply as if you were talking to a person right next to you. He is as close as the mention of His name.

So, I have found so many things to in life that are beautiful and amazing. I’ll save my 2nd experience for another day, but the bottom line can be summed up pretty well in a song by Ray Stevens…”Everything is Beautiful”

So begins the events of Friday, September 14th 2018…

We took my school class of 5 on an overnight camping trip to Winthrop. While there my hubby and his cousin, who was also helping keep an eye on the kiddos, decide to go scout around for some deer…well as it so happened, they spot this guy walking 30 yards out, he gets his bow and well the rest was history!

Needless to say the kids got a first hand experience they’ll never forget! 4 of the kids stayed to watch the entire process, from the gutting, to the skinning! Only my oldest son couldn’t handle it and begged to go back to camp! It didn’t help that we were literally on the bank of the river, working by headlamp, and the bats were flying so close to us that one boy got brushed on the forehead and then it almost touched my ear!

Well, it was a great trip but I am so tired and am now home and ready to drift away…😴

Goodnight!

Well, just having a peaceful moment while trying to unwind from a crazy day at school, and now trying to prepare myself for the adventure we’re about to embark on starting at 8am tomorrow morning! We are taking my entire class (6 kids) on a camping trip to Winthrop, Washington! As if 4 days a week with these crazies isn’t enough right?

So I’ve nursed my 2nd cup of coffee of the day and now I’m trying to encourage myself to get my bag packed before time to start getting ready for church…lol! Busy busy busy! It beats being bored though.

We’re anticipating a fun, memorable trip and all the kids are excited! We’re going with our friends who are hauling a huge RV over there while we haul 3 kids and a dog lol! We’ve got a scavenger hunt planned, a full blown nerf war will ensue at some point, and if the weather cooperates we have high hopes of swimming and swinging off the rope swing, and let’s not forget food! This group of ours know how to have good food! We’ll start off Saturday morning with my overnight french toast! Mmm! And then some nachos and pulled pork sandwiches and all kinds of amazing snacks…keeping fingers crossed the burn ban is off so we can enjoy a campfire.🔥

Well I’d better get my muscle to hustle before my hubby comes in and sees me in the same spot as the last few times he’s come through…lol!

Until next time! Over and out!

Well I guess I should just start with something, so here’s a picture of me with a totally fake, weird smile…I’ve come to realize most well intended selfies end up in a scrap heap of rejection at some point or t’other…but that don’t stop us, no sir, I ain’t no quitter! 😆 Oh well…

So I guess I can lay a little background for ya. I’m a socially introverted extrovert…ok actually I enjoy being around people and all that, but sometimes I feel like a sponge…I absorb alot of details alot of the time and therefore I tend to talk alot once the ice has been broken…like, I don’t overload on perfect strangers, I’m not weird, but once we are pretty familiar I like to use this simile in particular to describe myself…”I am like a living version of an Adjective.” Did I mention I’m a teacher? Well as it may be, I am and I love English most of all which probably will become evident as I begin to write about my “colorful” life. So sit back, grab some popcorn, and enjoy the show!

Tomorrow! 🤣😘

Until then….over and out!